The Plump Journal

“You deserve someone who loves you with every single beat of his heart, 
someone who thinks about you constantly, 
someone who spends every minute of every day just wondering what you’re doing,
 where you are, who you’re with, and if you’re OK.

You need someone who can help you reach your dreams and protect you from your fears. 
You need someone who will treat you with respect, 
love every part of you, especially your flaws. 
You should be with someone who could make you happy, 
really happy, dancing on air happy.”

- A letter from Alex to Rosie

“Our life is made up of time; 
our days are measured in hours, 
our pay measured by those hours, 
our knowledge is measured by years. 

We grab a few quick minutes in our busy day to have a coffee break. 
We rush back to our desks, we watch the clock, we live by appointments. 

And yet your time eventually runs out and you wonder in your heart of hearts 
if those seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years and decades 
were being spent the best way they possibly could. 

In other words, if you could change anything, would you?”

“Life is funny isn’t it? 
Just when you think you’ve got it all figured out, 
just when you finally begin to plan something, 
get excited about something, 
and feel like you know what direction you’re heading in, 
the paths change, 
the signs change, 
the wind blows the other way, 
north is suddenly south, and east is west, and you’re lost. 

It is so easy to lose your way, to lose direction. And that’s with following all the signposts”

- Cecelia Ahern, Love, Rosie

“It's funny because when you're a child, 
you believe you can be anything you want to be, 
go wherever you want to go. 

There's no limit to what you can dream. 
You expect the unexpected, 
you believe in magic, 
in fairy tales, 
and in possibilities. 

Then you grow older 
and that innocence is shattered 
and somewhere along the way the reality of life gets in the way 
and you're hit by the realization that you can't be all you wanted to be, 
you just might have to settle for a little bit less. 

Or perhaps 
a variation of what you once wanted. 

Why do we stop believing in ourselves? 
Why do we let facts and figures and anything but dreams rule our lives?”

What is happening to me? Weeks before turning twenty-seven I lost my job and now my savings are about to reach its final cents.

I say this is one of the hardest phases of my life. I, a 27 years old, single, jobless and stretching all the limits of my dwindling savings. I’ve been looking at job posting sites trying to look for vacancies sadly there is none that fits my job description/qualification and yes, asking salary. I’ve sent applications for oversees job vacancies and so far one has replied, and it’s a bad news, the others still no updates.

So what do I do now, I’ve been idle for two months. I am in a state of panic, my savings will not last long and I cannot accept that. Kidding aside, I really am in a panic, two months without an income is a really long time for me. Should I lower down my standards? Or better wait for what the future will bring?

A year ago, when I decided to join my friends in establishing a small company, my goals were set hard as stone. There is nothing to lose, but maybe something more to gain but things went rough at some point and we decided to stop for now.

I think we all thought this is not actually the right time (though we actually thought we are good enough, that we are strong enough to collide with the big names in the industry) some have their own priorities some are thinking of walking a different path, I myself is not satisfied. There is something missing, I am not satisfied, so when one accept a job offer somewhere, I thought that’s a sign to drop everything.

But that was two freaking months ago, summer has ended, a new school year has begun, I’ve been to different places this summer skinny dipping, pigging out, partying at every event, socializing with long lost high school friends, spend so much time with my family etc. is there something else that I didn’t do? Or is God preparing something for me? I hope so.

And this blog post is just one of my rants, one hot June evening, where the internet connection is so slow I can’t buffer the Korean Drama I’m currently addicted. Ciao!

There was a post I read a few months ago, it says something about “30 Things Every Women Should Know/Have by the Time She Turns 30”. Reading it, I was like “Oh My Gee! I’m not even half of what the writer wrote. What exactly did I learn this past twenty-seven years of my life?" I am freaking out, and surely some of you feel the same way.

Twenties, thirties, forties, are just numbers that silently tells people “maturity” but honestly, I know some of us are still trying to figure out a lot of things about ourselves.

A month ago, I attended the Grand Alumni Homecoming from my high school. Imagine, after 10 years of not even trying to take a peak of what had happened to my Alma mater and unintentionally cutting most of my ties with my high school friends, a classmate invited me and the whole batch to attend the event as a mark of our 10 years anniversary. Ten freaking years had passed! Can you imagine that?

Anyway, I decided to attend, who wouldn't when almost half of my batch mates started sending friend requests. The hype was probably due to the incoming batch reunion.

I met old friends; learn a thing or two about the “famous” personalities in our batch that has become “unremarkable”, chat with those I didn't get the chance to be close when we were in high school, found out who finished college, had a great career and those who got married right after high school.

The gossips are funny yet irritating at the same time. And when I got home, I started remembering my HS life. During those times I remember setting some goals; 1. To enter a great university, 2. To finish college and 3. Get a job.

I did all those things gracefully, and that was when I realized, everyone is expected to enter college, finish a degree and have a career right after high school. What comes next is the real challenge.

After those four long years of college (in my case it took me five years because I took engineering first then transferred to IT) you landed on a good job, but are you satisfied? No, the reason is because you want to do more things which requires a lot of money, but being a fresh graduate who doesn't have a good working experience in your field means your salary can’t keep up with your lifestyle.

After a year, you got promoted, your pay check increases so does your workload. Now you got more money but no more time. This is where you will learn how to prioritize and how to manage your time.

I know what my priorities are, I want a flourishing career without sacrificing my social life. I learned how to managed my time balancing work, social life, family time and me time. But that is not the case, no matter how good you are at time management, something will suffer.

I don’t know what, I can’t put a name on it, I just realized that I missed out something ten years after graduating from high school.

One day I am a high school student dreaming of becoming a well behaved, well educated, well traveled, knowledgeable woman in her early twenties, the next thing I know, I’m 25, a few more steps at the peak of the corporate ladder but suddenly drops on a slump.

I felt tired, I want to drop everything and just party. I want a new environment like I am an author who’s having a major writers block that needs a new inspiration. Luckily, a former boss invite me to join her team. So I wrote a resignation letter and just drop everything.

New office, new challenge, a great team, an even greater pay check, a workable work load gives me some satisfaction. Everything goes smoothly until the summer I lost my job.

Then I am turning 27 (today is May 08 at exactly 12:04 midnight, a few more days before I turned 27) and I am freaking out. My Facebook account is field with “getting married”, “having babies” updates.

My friends are posting their weekend with their husband/wife and kids. Everyone seems to be celebrating anniversaries, and here I am, a twenty something, a little bit successful, lovely lady with some savings, boyfriend less and jobless.

Dear heavens, what is happening to me?

Quote:

Tuesday came, I had two appointment in two different companies in the same area. The Australian owned company and a European owned company.

The European owned company has a great office and receptionist’s with pleasing personalities, plus the employees looked really professionals, the interviewer wasn’t late, she looks confident, asks great questions and everything went smoothly.

The first half of the interview is getting to know the applicant and your work experience. Questions like why did you leave the company, your previous salary and benefits, etc. will pop. This is also the part where the interviewer gives the applicant summary about the company. The benefits one will receive once he/she becomes part of the team, she also showed me around the office. Their pantry area is superb, the offices/room/floor for each team is great (man, each cubicle is equipped with MAC and some even have gaming consoles, a few offices also has a large television set with surround system) they also had a playroom, in fact their office is like Google’s office in some parts of the world.

The second half is the serious part where I think I did my best, but maybe they are not that impressed, can’t blame them, I don’t have a background on the position I am applying though I know a little bit about it, and they need someone ASAP.

And so, I didn’t get the position, but if one day they opened one that is related to what I do, I will definitely apply again, I am so in love with their working environment. They also said they will call me if a position related to my job opened, I can’t wait for that to happen.

Next, is the Australian owned company. This one is another great catch if you ever got the chance to become a part of their team, their office here is just about right, but they have other offices in Australia, New York, somewhere in Europe and somewhere else I already forgot.

Their staff is well educated, the working environment in professional yet friendly. The interview is a breeze, I didn’t had a hard time, (conceited aren’t we?) maybe because the interviewer is friendly and that he knows what he’s saying, he knows what to ask, maybe we are on the same wavelength.

The interview goes all about the job. I was offered with something exciting and new but is still related to what I do. We didn’t talk about the compensation package, but I know they’ll give what I deserve base on my qualifications and the position I will handle if ever I got in. I can’t wait for their call since at the moment there are other applicants lining up, I hope I got in.